Senthamil’s story

At Freedom from Torture, we provide one-to-one therapy, support groups such as gardening and music, and practical and legal support to people who have been tortured across the UK. We also work to protect survivors' rights and hold torturers to account.

Our services help men, women and children who have survived appalling violence and cruelty to put their lives back together. People like Senthamil.

Senthamil was tortured after taking the incredibly brave decision to help to smuggle out evidence of war crimes from Sri Lanka. Her story is one of resilience and hope, but many of her memories are deeply distressing. Please be aware that this article contains descriptions of sexual violence and torture. 

Blog by Senthamil 

“My name is Senthamil. I am 29 years old and come from a Tamil region in Sri Lanka. I was tortured there and my life changed forever..."

Ashamed and alone

When I first heard about Freedom from Torture I was lying in hospital in London. I was at my lowest point, recovering after trying to take my own life.

I felt so ashamed and alone, I didn’t know where to turn. The nurses there told me: “There is an organisation that can help you. Don’t worry, we will make sure they see you quickly.

That’s how my recovery began. I got an urgent appointment at Freedom from Torture with a wonderful lady called Emine. She saw how bad I was feeling and booked me in for regular one-to-one therapy sessions.

I was tortured in every way imaginable. I thought death would come each time the latch on my cell door moved. Beatings with a heavy pole – even on my head. Cigarettes applied to my bare skin. My thumbs bent backwards until I thought my hand would break. And rape – so painful I blacked out.

Learning to trust

At first I just cried and cried, hunched over and staring at the floor. But gradually, I began to trust Emine. She was so nice to me and encouraged me to share my problems, not keep them inside. Torture harms you in so many ways. It was very difficult to talk about.

I got an urgent appointment at Freedom from Torture with a wonderful lady called Emine. She saw how bad I was feeling and booked me in for regular one-to-one therapy sessions.”

I was tortured in every way imaginable. I thought death would come each time the latch on my cell door moved. Beatings with a heavy pole – even on my head. Cigarettes applied to my bare skin. My thumbs bent backwards until I thought my hand would break. And rape – so painful I blacked out. Even once I was freed it wasn’t over – I felt so dirty and worthless.

You wouldn’t believe the progress I’ve made now. I’ve got a job and have even enrolled on a Master’s course in nutrition. And I volunteer at a charity helping other refugee women learn to cook healthy, inexpensive meals.